Joburg – I am a Black, queer writer and speaker. I was most recently a programme consultant in an International Justice project for the Institute of Justice and Reconciliation with a focus on the prosecution of sexual and gender-based in armed conflict.
I also planned and managed an international conference on the topic, and the conference was attended by ICC prosecutors, international lawyers and various academics across Africa.
I’m a sex-positive and digital activist, opining on rape culture, consent, BDSM, sexual and reproductive health and pleasure, especially as they relate to being queer and Black in South Africa. I also facilitate workshops on the same.
My sex-positivity is intrinsically linked to my feminism; it is intersectional. As long as it is between consenting adults making informed decisions in environments they choose I completely support it.
I’m a fierce advocate for ‘your kink is not my kink’ and I wish more people would be aware of the fact you don’t need to be personally interested or invested in something to ‘allow’ others to dabble, explore and experience something.
I also don’t believe in any form of sex-positivity that doesn’t include people who are often disenfranchised and oppressed, including Black womxn, trans, gender non-conforming, non-binary people, disabled people as well as sex workers.
Think deeply about what you want, in every aspect of your life. When you know what you want – or are able to be aware of the fact that you don’t yet know – your journey is a bit clearer. Do whatever it is you want to and don’t allow societal expectations make you soften your edges or alter who you want to be.
I co-founded Meet Greet Kneel, a safe and healthy space where people get together to learn, share and explore kink and pleasure.
I’ve appeared on Motswako, The Big Debate, Shift and Daily Thetha and have featured on Power FM and SA FM for my thoughts on sexual health, feminism, pleasure and kink.
My writing on these topics have also been featured in Marie Claire, The Citizen, Huffington Post and MTV Shuga and Writing What We Like, a book edited by Yolisa Qunta.
Check this out:
The Kink Realm is a resource I adore, it’s run by a Black American womxn and speaks about BDSM in a way that many beginners can understand, but also in a manner that many kinksters are able to have discussions that are open and insightful.